8 weeks

I check my email in a Paul-like manner lately.  If you don't know about his habit, well it is excessive - though he'd deny it.  I got him a smart phone the day he became Dr. P-Lo, and he says it is one of his most treasured gifts of all time.  Not only does it alert him each and every time he gets a new email (from any of his 3 email accounts) but he can also read and reply to these emails.  Me, well I just want a phone that wants to be a phone - though I do adore text messages the camera capabilities of my ghetto hand-me-down cell from my mom.  

and I got way off track.

Continuing on...

I am hoping, praying, wishing that some hospital in KY will email or call to tell me I have an interview.  Three months ago I had 3 different job offers, but 3 months ago we weren't ready to move.  Now that we are ready, it would figure that there aren't any jobs. 

So we will stay here, until 1)I get a job in KY or 2)middle/late July when we move because P will start working August 15th (we need to have time to get settled in before he starts).

That means we have 8 weeks left in Oregon.

8 weeks.

I'm all kinds of emotions about this.  Before this weekend I was all sunshine and rainbows about moving - I was too busy dreaming of a house and yard for my kids to play in, a new RN job in the hospital, exploring a new state, making KY feel like home, meeting new people, creating "family" in KY, etc.  I still am this way, but this weekend I had a reality check when my parents and sisters came over to visit.  My sista J sporadically had leaky eyes.  She was struggling, I knew it, but she wouldn't let it out cause she loves me too much to do that - or to do that just yet.  I could tell she was thinking that her quick trips she makes here, just to spend the day with me and her favorite little people, are limited, and though she never said this, it was clear.  Her sad eyes said it all.  The tears would build up, and she would try to force them to stop.  She tried, oh she did try.  But I caught her, and I didn't make a fuss about it, because I don't want to be fussing about it.

Not yet.  Because 8 weeks leaves SO much time still for fun, and for memories.

Trial run

This morning I was nursing J at 5:30am, the perfect alarm clock.  A sweet moment with my sweet girl before heading out to my first day back at work.  She nursed forever, which is unusual for her, but good since she would have to deal with the dreaded gas forming, plastic nipple of a bottle for the next 11 hours.

I quickly throw on my scrubs, grab my stuff and head out the front door.  To prevent waking little loves in our modest 3 bedroom apartment where the smallest of noise sounds huge, I transformed the front seat of the Nissan Sentra into a beauty salon.  I quickly put on some mascara and threw my hair into a ponytail - and I was set.

The mascara, however didn't last.  Black tears started falling as I pulled out of the parking lot.

Sheesh I can't even imagine the wreck I'd of been if I was leaving my kids with someone else.

Pull it together I thought, they are home with their dad for crying out loud.

See I like my job, but I love my kids.  So leaving them to go to work, well it was tough.  MUCH tougher than I anticipated.

and 11 hours is a long time.  Really long.

But Paul rocked the day, just like he knew he would.  Truth be told, I had doubts.  See before today, the only time Paul spent with all three kids solo was while I went running - which was always planned at a time when Jovie was sleeping, and even then I was only gone for 35 minutes max.

To boost my assurance in his capability to juggle the 3 little loves, I asked him if we could do a trial run to see how he handles it before the real deal - he said "if I'm going to walk on hot coal I'm definitely not going to practice doing it."

Imagine my concern when just last night I observed the formation of the "how to take care of Jovie" list he was creating.  Proof that some kids (our kids) do, in fact, come with owners manuals.  Joking aside, this is just one of the many reasons I am so madly in love with my Mr...no shame in writing down a plan of attack to be prepared to trouble shoot what to do when Jovie cries.  A few of my favorite details taken straight from his "how to take care of Jovie" list

•  DON'T FREAK OUT!
• sometimes babies just cry and there is nothing you can do to fix it.

I helped him to fine tune his list with the mama secrets of if she does ab&c, then I do xy&z.

So there wasn't a trial run, and there didn't need to be.  And now I feel bad for second guessing him, and worrying like a maniac all day long.

I even got a text message at noon that said "can her (Jovie's) clothes be dried?"

I guess he was trying to get some action tonight.  First he was doing an amazing job watching our 3 little loves, and now he is further proving his capability by doing laundry too?!

Stud.

I came home to an apartment that WASN'T a complete wreck, the kids were happy.  Paul, however, looked exhausted.

He mentioned something about not getting laid before his first day solo with three kids.  I mentioned something about being up until midnight with a hyperactive baby, and then up again at 2am to nurse Jovie, and then up for the day at 5:30am - relating to 5 hours of interrupted sleep.

So maybe, just maybe he can do this again next week, 3 days in a row.

Only time will tell, because there isn't going to be a trial run.

But tonight, well, I am spending some time with my Mr. : ).

Traits

I feel extremely lucky to have biological children.  Not just one, but 3.  I love being able to look at my kids and declare each trait of similarity.  In the hospital it was easy to see that she clearly has my monkey toes and her daddy's ears.  I thought it was so funny how many of my family members said - "oh goodness she looks so much like you."  I thought she looked so much like her big brother Kiplin - who I think resembles Paul so much more than me. 

Then I came across this picture of me, as a squishy faced brand new baby...

and so I had to compare it to my sweet girl when she was a squishy faced brand new baby too... multiple pictures cause I like options.  Keep in mind I was 8lb 2oz at birth, and my sweet girl was 5lbs 15oz.

and so now I see it, the similarity.

But of her traits, my favorite of them all, is one her daddy gave her.  It is the same trait that her daddy's mom gave him.  They all have it, and it is something that just makes my heart melt every.single.time it happens.

When she smiles, her eyes join in too.  This makes her eyes almost disappear when she flashes a huge grin.  So she'll probably have some pre-mature "crows feet" as a result, but oh goodness how I love, LOVE this.

Brand new - 1 day old

2 weeks old

5 weeks old

6 weeks old

 

7 weeks old

10 weeks old

 

11 weeks old

Mother's day gifts

• Sleeping in with Jovie until 9am.  Hallelujah.

• Hugs and kisses.
• A rock.  Not just any rock, but a smooth, flat, "treasure rock."
• A stick.  Not just any stick, a stick that was collected while R was on a walk with daddy and K.
• A dandelion. 

• 2 pipe cleaners.  Not just any pipe cleaner, two of em', twisted together.  A "gift for mother's day" from my favorite 4 year old.
• A piece of paper with 4 pumpkin stickers.  
• to clean up the tornado that is Kiplin

• To play dress up with my little girl, and take pictures - she didn't have a choice.

 Sticking her tongue out at me :)

baby rolls forming on her thighs - yes they are really there!

• To go on an hour long walk, just me and Jovie, in the rain.
• To skip cooking dinner - love my Mr. so much!
• A beautiful rainbow

• Baby coos and smiles during tummy time

• A baby who fell asleep at 9pm, much earlier than usual midnight bedtime.

Growth as a mom

The little love stayed up until 1am.  At just 2 months old she has it figured out, that evenings are for her.  She doesn't have to compete for attention.  Once she did settle down, she was up to nurse every 1-2 hours - just a growth spurt, I hope.

The middle little woke at 6am, a crying, screaming, slobbery, snotty, mess.  He continued on like this for the remainder of the day - just teething, I hope.

The oldest is exceptionally needy and isn't listening very well - just exhaustion, I hope.

and I am the adult.

So I get to keep it all together.  I get to speak love and show kindness even when my oldest refuses to pick up the Play-Doh strewn all over the kitchen floor, demanding that he is just "way, way, way too hungry to pick up."  I get to convince him that picking up his Play-Doh mess is better than going in the corner and then picking up the Play-Doh mess, all while trying to make lunch as quickly as possible in order to tend to the simultaneous cries of my babies.

He makes a bummer of a decision, and so the microwave timer gets set for 4 minutes - make that 5 minutes for yelling "you should be the one going in the corner for being bossy mom"

So I get to speak love and show kindness, despite his reactions.  I get to be his mom, and I get to show him right from wrong.  I don't want to teach him wrong.

The timer beeps -

Why did you go in the corner Ryker?

For not picking up my Play-doh and being all fussy.  I'm sorry, really sorry.

We hug, I tell him I love him so very much, and he picks up his Play-Doh, this time without complaining.  

His face says he is sorry.  He then covers his ears, proclaims "there is just way too much fussiness going on!"

I smile, in agreement, but thankful that I get to experience this "way too much fussiness."

I love my kids, I love the sunshine and rainbow filled days, but I also love these challenging days.  I love that I get to be the one to help shape, form, mold them into little people.

As much as I wanted to just join in on the fuss-fest, I get to be the adult, the example of what I want them to be.

Lunch time ended, nap time and quiet time begins.

He slips down from the table, flashes a dimple smile at me, says I love you so much mom, have a nice time with Jovie while I do quiet time.

and that is all the reassurance that I need.  I get to be a mom, their mom.  It is a role I've always wanted, and I am so thankful I get to do this.

I was reflecting about this during my walk with Jovie tonight.  I was thinking about all the things that my friends are requesting for Mother's day - and while I am so happy for them that they are in a situation that they can ask and receive these sort of gifts, it really puts things into perspective for me.

I know we have way too much going on in our life right now for some extravagant Mother's Day gift, but I also know that what I have already is so much more than enough.

No diamond earrings, or dozen roses, or gourmet chocolates can ever compare to the gift my husband has already given me and continues to bless me with daily - our 3 children.  I am so, SO blessed to have them.  To get to be a mom.  Wearing my sweet Jovie in the sling sure beats wearing some fancy, expensive jewelry.  I'll take them over materialistic goods, ALWAYS.

Comparison

 Kip is on the top, Jovie is on the bottom.  If Jovie was chunky, I think they'd look really similar.  Here they are at the exact same age (10 weeks old) - to the day - only Kip is almost 5lbs heavier than Jovie.

 

 and these pictures were taken almost exactly 1 year apart - Kip at 8 months and then Kip at 20 months old - my how he is growing up, my giant baby.

In 16 days I go back to work, which means P is going to be home with the kids Thurs - Sat from 6:00am till 5:00pm, which in case you didn't calculate it, that is 11 HOURS each day for 3 days in a row. This could be interesting...

So I am soaking up every last minute of my days as a SAHM - stay at home mom - cause they are coming to a fast end :(.

This might be my favorite picture of the boys to date, despite their lovely attire, clearly they get their fashion sense from daddy. 

and a successful capture of a Jovie smile this afternoon

Ryker just being "super mega fast"

and my husband and his gettup for his run tonight.  Clearly he is not fashion savvy - the boys clearly get their fashion sense from him.

Mondays can be fabulous...

• Paul walked in the door at 3pm today...3 hours earlier than we anticipated him home.
• R cracks me up again - when in the car on our way to Costco, R informs me that he has all the sudden out grown his car seat because according to him - his "wiener is too big to fit in it..."
• I took the kids (still feels so funny to get to say kids, instead of boys) to Costco, solo.  It went beautifully until we hit the food court - I feel sorry for the Costco worker who had to clean our frozen yogurt off the floor, why do they fill those cups so full anyway?  Then I made the mistake of letting Kip take his smoothie in the car, in a non-kid-proof cup...lets just say our new-to-us van is officially broken in, and Kip's favorite blanket headed in the washing machine as soon as we walked in the door.
• Moving expenses to KY are taken care of!
• Health insurance - our hospital bill from Jovie's birth and all the extra tests done her first rough week of life was $15,850 - we pay only $800 of it!
• After 2 months with difficulty nursing - Jovie is finally getting better at it.  Here is to hoping for some chunky baby thighs under cute sundresses soon!
• The gray skies cleared up for an evening spent outside getting dirty with the boys - sidewalk chalk, bubbles and an adventure walk.
• Evening 3 mile walk just me and Jovie