Sick day

One of the docs from my last job told me it would be week 6 that sucks the worst after moving.  But slowly by 6 months things will be more established, routine, and settled.  So I just need to hang on for 5 more months.  He ended his explanation with "trust me, I'm a psychiatrist."

He was right.

I called my mom yesterday, crying.  I said a lot, she said nothing.  It was just what I needed. 

3,200 miles separate us, but she is still there for me, like she has always been.

It was a huge changing week last week - Paul and I started working full time, Ryk started preschool, Jovie and Kiplin were home with the nanny.  So many emotions, but the one that was most obvious, guilt - for being at work every.single.day, for missing Ryk's first (and second and third) day of preschool, for leaving my kids when they are crying. I know it is a transition, and it will get easier.

It is hard, not impossible.

So if week 6 is the hardest, we are getting through it together, and by month 6 we will be golden.
*****
Ryk brought home some amazing prized masterpieces he completed at preschool - they are proudly displayed on the fridge.

He also brought home our first cold of the season.

And now, all 3 of the kids are sick.  I am thankful to get the sickness all over with at once, and not have sickness lingering on forever.  But it is a moment like this that makes me so very aware that I have 2 hands and 0 extended family to come help, and with 3 sick kids who want held, and a husband that still has to work...

So today, I am thankful for relationships that span across a cell phone.  A simple text message just asking how things are going or just saying I love you...priceless.

I started off this week calling in sick, to a job I am just starting my 2nd week at, which doesn't make me look good.  At all.

But they are the priority.

and no one, absolutely no on can make me feel guilty for having my priorities straight.  I'm a mom first, always.  I learned from the best.

Today I am attempting to keep up with 3 runny noses, and try to minimize the nagging coughing

So we are having a calm day here, which is not easy with my 3 rowdy kids.

So far we have:

• put together three 100 piece puzzles, by we I mean Ryk.  He did all the work while I wiped noses, rocked crying babies, and gave some sideline shout outs of "you are the puzzle master" to Ryk so he would feel like I was participating.   
• rolled 62 play-doh balls.  Ryk's request.  We only put away 58, which means Ryk needs to practice his counting, or else there are a few ones hanging around from when Kiplin started throwing them.  Some things are just not worth worrying about, dried up play-doh balls, or play-doh smooshed into the carpet is not on my worry list today.  
• Stacked snack time crackers

• Read books in bed - though that lasted about two seconds before Kiplin escaped

• played the piano - yes he is using his toes.

•  snuggling up in bed with a DVD player

• Did some spinning in the computer chair

yes he gave me the hand, and thus the reason for my limited pictures of Ryk

• Built cars, which started out as a calm activity until they had to crash them so that they could be put together again.

 and there are noses to wipe...

Savoring

She lays, in the nook of my arm, in a total mama's milk coma.  Her arm relaxed to the side with her petite hand spread wide open.  She is just so tiny, and perfect.

And breathtakingly beautiful.

So I am sitting, with my feet up, enjoying and being present for this moment.  I try to tell myself, just until 9:20pm, then I will get up.  I will lay her in her crib, tuck her favorite pink ruffled blanket under her arms, kiss her tiny nose, and whisper sweet dreams Joviebug.

 
There are insurance plans to choose, classes to enroll in for work, toys to pick up, dishes to clean, sleep to obtain.

But 5 minutes turn into 10, and then soon it is 10pm, and I am...we are...still here.


Because it was just yesterday I was here, savoring this with Ryker, today he went to his 2nd day of preschool.

And so I have a messy house.

These precious moments are escaping too quickly.

A day of firsts

I use to think you had to be rich, and stuck up, to have a nanny.

I also thought only moms who couldn't handle their kids, or just needed "mommy time" you know, to go to the spa or spend hours at the gym hired nannies.

Well, we are neither rich, nor stuck up (least I hope people would agree with that).

and up until my parenting failure of a day last week, I thought I was a mom who could handle her kids...my mom reassured me that even good moms have their moments when they need to call for Nana to come rescue the day...(sad moment #3).  If you know of a rent.a.grandma in KY, let me know.
I also thought the only mommy time I ever needed was my 30-60 minute run each day (which up until we moved to KY, I'd bring Jovie along with me, so really it wasn't even mommy time).
All to get to the point of, we hired a nanny...you know, to cover the moments when I am working.
Sweet B, a mama of a school aged kiddo, with a nice Kentucky flair.  My kids instantly loved her.

Ryk likes the way she talks.

So B was here today.  Today was the first time my babies were watched, for an entire work day, by someone other than family.  I would be lying if I didn't admit to crying last night, and then while getting ready for work, and on the drive to work (sad moment #4...but who is counting).

It is a hard, amazingly hard, transition.  Truth be told my kids are taking it better than me. 

After some hesitation, and proclaiming loudly while at school - "I hate it here" Paul left a very ticked Ryk alone, for his first day.  A phone call check in a hour later proved he settled in just fine.  At the end of the day, Ryk rocked the preschool, P said that the kids were chanting his name from the playground as Ryk was leaving for the day.  He was beaming as he told me about his day, showing me his masterpiece he created while there.  He is looking forward to going back.

Kip and Jovie loved sweet B, Kip even blew her kisses when she left.

Now I am snuggling a sweet bundle that I missed like mad today.  It is a 5 day work week filled with orientation.  I am dreading it. 

Here is to hoping the next few days play out like today!  We sure needed this sort of day :).

Kiplin's 2!

I am the second born in my family, perhaps that is why my sweet Kiplin has such a special place in my heart. 

2nd born or not, there is just something special about this "middle child" of ours.  He has an energy I have never seen before.  Paul has been referred to as the "Energizer bunny on steroids" and I think our Kiplin has inherited that trait.  He is our little guy who, when excited, jumps up and down and says "sure, sure, SURE!  He has a routine of doing daily morning laps running around the house the moment he wakes up.  Jumping on the bed, yes we allow it, is probably his favorite thing to do.  Lately he learned to somersault, which absolutely freaks Paul out.  Numerous times a day he requests to "go outside quease?" and then proceeds to put on his shoes. 

He is a smartie that Kiplin...and I can only imagine how busy he is going to keep us. 

Such a polite little boy, always saying "quease," "tank you" and "sorry."  His vocab is sure exploding lately, and so his fussy moments are decreasing.  He is slow to become frustrated now that he is able to verbalize his needs.  This leaves for one happy little boy, and one happy home. 

I am all emotional since my Kippy turned 2 and Jovie turned 6 months old today.  Tomorrow I'll leave them both, and return back to work...which is another post for another day.  Goodness how I love my kids!

6 years

6 years ago, I was waking up in my parent's house.  It was the last morning spent as a "single lady."  The queen size bed in the downstairs room, was at capacity, hosting 4, yes 4, girls.  Some of my favorite girls.  I woke up next to my best (girl) friend and my sister and cousin.  One of the last nights that I would wake up to someone besides my Mr.

I would describe our special day as magical, the Mr., in typical man fashion would speak of that night being magical...just saying.

While I perused the aisles of Target last night, with my baby girl in the sling, I wondered, even if I had money would get him anything?  I know this sounds terrible.  But you have to understand that we have been college students our entire married life, up until this anniversary.  With just relocating our family of 5 across the country, well, we are still in the "poor house."  But soon enough...

Someday, we'll hit up an anniversary date/minivacation just the two of us.

For now I'll enjoy this life.  Where a babygirl wakes me, peeking her little smiling eyes out at me through her crib bars.  The smile just screams, pick me up-love me mama.  I'll open the bedroom door to a little boy, who is just a day away from 2 years old.  He jumps down from his mattress and his little feet pitter-patter across the floor super eager for the day.  He says "love you mom" as he reaches for my hand to head down the stairs.  My Rykiebear will join us a tad later, with "morning mom, how was your sleep, good?  GOOD!"

and I'll cook cinnamon rolls.  and we'll wait for the Mr. to wake (he stayed up late working...)

We will have a day, together, the 5 of us.

I have dreams of an Olive Garden family dinner.  Hope it plays out as well as I think it can.

Our life is magical.

Even though some days, (yesterday, and the day before that) aren't the fairy tale that I had dreamed of that night 6 years ago when I was at my parent's house.  Every day has been perfect.

I couldn't imagine a better person to share this life with.

So thankful you are mine, Paul.

To many more years, and hopefully an upcoming anniversary with a vacation :).

Same shorts, different kid

Yesterday Kiplin said "hold Jojie"  and so I let him.  Thankfully the camera was right next to the couch.  My inability to put the camera in the proper place (the camera bag) after each use sometimes works in my favor, except when it doesn't (like all day yesterday when I couldn't find it). 

And when I looked at the picture I knew instantly it was going to be one of my favorites, not because the photograph is amazing - taken in poor lighting, with a flash, point and shoot action...yuck! - but because it is such a tender moment shared between my two babies.  A picture that I think only a mama loves.

Which had me thinking that there was also a photo similar to this one of my babies, that I took of my boys last year.  A tender moment shared between Ryk and Kip.  This photo still remains one of my favorites too...

and the fact that R and K are wearing the same shorts...well, just goes to show 1)we are mega thrifty and 2)Kip is WAY bigger than R was, since R was wearing these shorts at 3.5 years old, and well Kip will be 2 in just a couple of days.

Erratic weather

In January, when Paul and I were here to get a feel for the area, I remember being in the car with a realtor.  We were driving, and all of the sudden the skies turned from blue to black, and it started raining.  Her fingers grasped the wheel, white knuckled grasp.  She said she really hated driving in this weather, and Paul and I looked at each other and laughed.  We were Oregonians, we knew rain, and well at the time there wasn't a lot of it.  But to the relator, she said it was a lot.  She went on to say the weather here was so erratic, and changed in a matter of minutes.

She wasn't kidding.

Now I know why she white knuckled the steering wheel that day, and further explained the erratic weather here to us.
 

It was blue skies, 88 degrees on Saturday.  All of the sudden, the skies turned black around 5pm.  Rain started pouring, the winds picked up to 70mph.  Looking out our front windows we couldn't see anything.

Ryk, oblivious to what was going on outside, was trying on his new soccer gear for me to see.  Paul and Ryk had just gotten back with his stuff.  "Check out these crazy socks, they are itchy but dad says if I want to play, I just hafta wear them."

Then the thunder started.  Paul and I tried to remember what we had learned (in elementary school probably, we are cool like that) about counting the time between the thunder rumble and when the lightning strikes - one.one.thousand, two - and it happened.  The counting got to where it was just the loudest thunder rumble, and then a huge flash of lightning.  The lightning made our dark, powerless house light up.  Our crazy kids just wanted to stand in the window sills watching it, and so because we are use to Oregon thunderstorms, we let them.

We all stood in the living room, starring out the window in awe of this "incredible storm" per Ryker.  It didn't dawn on me that we probably should be in the basement until I thought I saw a car shake.

My eyes weren't mistaking me, the car did shake, but with the sideways rain coming down at several inches an hour, and the crazy winds what I didn't see was the reason the car moved.

 We were all just standing there, in the living room.  Oblivious as to what was actually going on outside. 

 Red brick house in this picture, yep that is where we live.  The red taillights of the  van in this picture is our van.  The luck of it all, thankfully Paul and Ryk left to go get his soccer stuff when they did.  It put them home just minutes before this storm, and no joke, the car that has the tree on top of it, that is exactly the spot where our Nissan was parked before P and R left to get the soccer stuff.

Other pictures, from around the area we live.  All within about a 10 mile radius of our house.

This is the gas station where I pumped my gas for the first time 3 weeks ago...

Thus the reason why about 112,000 people were without power for a couple days.

We now know the importance of an emergency supply kit.  Our power was out for a long time, and once it was restored, it went out again.

We were not prepared in the slightest, no candles or flashlights.

My big concern without electricity was Jovie's milk in the freezer going bad.  It was quite the ordeal to get my stock of breast milk shipped here to us (thanks so much M and E), and with me going back to work on Monday we really need it!  So once the storm passed Paul went out in search of ice (to keep the breastmilk frozen while we waited for our power to be restored, and also find something to eat for dinner.

P waited in a line that started out the door at McD's to get us some food.  According to LG&E pre-recorded voice message to help deal with the overpouring calls to report power outage, approxiametly 112,000 customers were without power.  Apparently everyone of these customers decided to hit up McD's for dinner.

So P and I had the most romantic dinner ever, McD's in the pitch black of our home at 9pm.

We woke up the next morning, still no power, and a fridge full of spoiled food.

So this weather here, erratic.

We're not in Oregon anymore...

Erasing Oregon

Slowly all things Oregon are being replaced, which brings my sad count up to two.  I suppose for being here family and friendless that a sad count of 2 isn't too terrible for three weeks.

In my wallet now sits a Kentucky drivers license.  I traded in my fat face Oregon one (I was 32 weeks pregnant with Kip when it was taken) for a mug shot of a photo, and it cost me $20.  I suppose it is better than the drugged out look Paul displays on his new license...perhaps that white tank he attempted to wear,
but changed after I told him a professor shouldn't have a drivers license photo that is totally white trash, would of completed the look.

I finally turned my trusty ironman watch from Oregon to Kentucky time...it has been 3 hours slow for 3 weeks. 

Now we just have to get the license plates transferred...which I am in no hurry to do.  The process is not only expensive, but seems like a total headache in the making.  That and having Oregon plates gives us the - they drive like idiots because they are from out of town and have no idea where they are going - advantage. 

My phone still displays current weather and time in Portland, which will probably remain forever. 

Perhaps someday I will find one of those "made in Oregon" sweatshirts to sport on my sad days, the perfect cozy, comfort item.  I always thought those were the stupidest shirts ever...when I was an Oregon.  Now I think those "gettin' lucky in Kentucky" shirts I see on people here are the stupidest shirts.

And this post is about the stupidest post ever.

Enjoying

He is acting like his almost 2 year old brother, for the millionth time today.  He'll be 5 in October.  Not cool. 

So today, I am practicing patience, just like yesterday, and the day before.

He is teaching me, more than he thinks I am teaching him (or trying to teach him).

Teaching me to be a mommy, everyday teaching me to be better.

I see the small victories. 

When he refuses to practice writing letters, or learn his address, or about what to do in an emergency I am amazed that...

Outside he will write anything I ask, sidewalk chalk makes it so much more fun.

Or when that ambulance drives by while we are in the car, conversation sparks.

Me - "What would you do if mommy was hurt and needed help when daddy wasn't home?"

Ryk - "I'd call 911 and say, my mommy needs help, and tell them where we live."

Me - "Where do we live Ryker?"

-he perfectly recites our address.  

The address I was trying to teach him one day, while discussing emergency situations.  He kept saying "well I don't want to learn it, I'm just 'gignoring' you."

Me - "Ryk it is IGNORING, not gignoring."

Ryk - "ugh, I say it is gignoring, so it is gignoring!"

I admire his strong will.  I gave it to him, so I better.

Soon he will start soccer, and other activities too.  Soon we will figure out what we are doing about preschool.  

Oh.my.goodness how did he get so old?

*****

He wakes up, several times each night.  He'll be 2 in a couple weeks.  Not cool.

He has way more energy than I know what to do with.

 But he is kind, and gentle, and loving.  He hugs and kisses, and loves to the moon and back.

*****

She is tired, but refuses to sleep.

*****
and between the three of them, I am sleep deprived.  I have been sleep deprived for the last 4.5 years, and I don't see it changing anytime in the next 18 years.

I am told it is beyond 18 years, since a parent never does stop parenting.  Always wondering, worrying, and thinking about their babies - whether they are 5 months, 23 months, 4.5 years old, or 26 years old...

But we have them, our 3 little loves.  Having them is worth it all.

*****

So when she is still up partying at 11pm tonight, instead of wishing her to sleep, I'll sit, stare, enjoy, and cherish these moments.  Soon she'll join in on the 7pm bedtime routine.  Soon she won't be nursing from 7pm until 10pm at night. 

Soon she won't need me so much.   

And despite needing caffeine on a regular basis in order to function, I don't want soon to come.

So instead of wishing it away, I'll sit and enjoy it.  Every bit of it.

Our first day exploring the Louisville Zoo

It was a girls night out, we went shopping at Once Upon a Child. We left the house full of boring boys - Paul with his stiff neck (he tweaked it, and refuses to comply with any physical therapy recommendations...) and R and K were in bed. A full day at the Louisville Zoo wore them out.

R said there were just a bunch of lame birds there, and that "the zoo in Oregon was way more cooler."  Well, we did see mostly birds, but that is because we weren't going to check out the animals.  We went to go play at the splash pad - which I didn't get any pictures of because it was little kid chaos there.  My head was spinning just trying to keep track of my own little boys while keeping Jovie cooled off and in the shade, as much as possible.  The boys had a blast, and so the workout of keeping up with 3 little kids at the zoo, in the Kentucky heat/humidity, in August was worth it.

Kiplin only knows one speed - and it is crazy fast.  He was running all over.  With the head/humidity, we were only able to stay just shy of 2 hours, I didn't want them to get over heated.

There were geese just randomly roaming.  Kiplin kept mimicking the honk noise they made.  R thought K was insane running around going "HONK," and well I was just cracking up.  Never a dull moment.

And our fun filled outing quickly turned sour as J and K started to cry.  Thankfully we were already attempting to make our way to the car.  I say attempting because Ryk was the path leader and he assured me he knew how to read the exit signs.  I managed to get a calf cramp trying to push the double stroller up the hills getting to the car.  Poor R was practically running to try and keep up with me.  He asked at one point to get in the stroller, I told him that he could have a piggy back ride instead.  He jumped on, then declared I was "way to disgusting to touch" and said he would rather just run...smart kid.  

On the way to the Zoo exit, we managed to run into these guys...and R said he wished Nana was there, since "giraffes are my Nana's favorite."

This little baby is the same age as Jovie...

I tried to convince R to stand in front of the giraffes so I could take a picture, but despite telling him otherwise, he was absolutely convinced that the giraffe would reach down and lick his face.

Here he is charging the rhinos.

Ryk - "Hey look, it is you and dad, you know, if you were rhinos...hahahahaha."

Me - "Dad and I could sure use a day to just lay around like that!"

*****
Back to our girls night out...while searching through the massive amount of baby girl clothes, I was talking with another mom who had a baby girl that was 6 months old.  She was a giant 6 month old baby girl, 18 lbs.  It was such a funny comparison of our two girls, both 6 months old - but worlds different in size.  It made me smile thinking that size wise that baby girl was the size of my Kippy at 6 months old.  I now know why I am such a huge fan of using baby slings.  Aside from the amazing comfort that my babies feel being so close to me, it is so much easier on my body and gives me both of my hands to use.  There isn't any way I could of managed to carry Kip around without one.

Anyway, off on a tangent.

This mom I met, was out shopping with her mom.  Three generations of girls, just out shopping on a Friday night at a kids consignment store.  I was sad, for the first time, about being here.

Sad because I kept hearing - "just let Nana hold her so you can shop."

Not sad because I needed someone to hold Jovie, she was content as can be in the sling next to my heart, but because I wanted that.

I like it here, I honestly do.  I just don't like that I don't get to do a 7pm shopping trip to Once Upon a Child with my mom, or that I don't get to hear "just let Nana hold her so you can shop."

What we are up to...

I can no longer put Jovie in one place, and think she will remain there. We have a rolling baby on our hands, and girlfriend is getting quick. This video was taken at the very end of her night - about 11pm - so she is slower in her movements.

Just a typical moment with the boys...I'd like to say the mess is atypical, however that would be a lie. 

Job offer

Today I curled my hair, and put on make up.  Two rare things these days.  And no, sadly it wasn't for date night.

I decided to forgo the "power suit" since mine is currently a size too small, no one likes love handles, a muffin top, and visible panty lines.  Instead I dressed in cheap consignment store black dress pants, and a modest, rather informal green top.  My curled ponytail swished back and forth from the awkward gait that wearing heels once in a blue moon brings.  The click-clack-click-clack that those horrendously uncomfortable shoes made as I walked down the brand new hall of the hospital reminded me I was far from my typical stay at home mommy role I have easily fallen back into the past month.

The interview was just shy of 2 hours long - which had me feeling encouraged as I drove home.  I spoke to P about it, and dreamed about what reality would be like with me working full time, night shift. 

And by 5pm, I got a call on my phone.  A 502 area code, and my heart started to beat a little faster.

The hiring manager called to tell me that "I can't officially say anything, as HR has to call tomorrow or the next day, but I'll just say that I am so excited for you honey."  Yes, she did call me honey, which I am beginning to realize is just the norm here.  She also stated that she knew she was going to hire me before I even walked out of her office.  Yes, I am tooting my own horn, and later I'll probably indulge in some ice cream - rightfully earned after landing a job AND running tonight.

So tonight, I'll revel in excitement for my first hospital nursing position.

Tomorrow, I'll worry about the logistics of it all - working full time nights on a neuro/oncology/telemetry floor while lovingly raising my 3 little loves, AND being the most amazing wife...sigh.